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<title>Paradise on The Outback by sleepymarvel</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22792702">Paradise on The Outback</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleepymarvel/pseuds/sleepymarvel'>sleepymarvel</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>MST3k One-Shots [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Mystery Science Theater 3000</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Gen, Missing Scene, angst? in my mst3k fanfic? it's more likely than you think, australian outback</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 17:54:12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>742</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22792702</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleepymarvel/pseuds/sleepymarvel</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The moments that pass between Joel’s last transmission to the satellite and his crash landing in the Australian Outback are probably the most frightening of his entire life.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>MST3k One-Shots [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1444786</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Paradise on The Outback</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>“Sorry folks, I can't come back. I don’t know how it works. Goodbye!”</em>
</p><p>The moments that pass between Joel’s last transmission to the satellite and his crash landing in the Australian Outback are probably the most frightening of his entire life. The escape pod picks up speed, red flashing warning lights fill the small metal capsule, his ears pop, and suddenly he can barely breath. He’s not sure if that’s because the oxygen supply is gone or because he’s having a panic attack. He really hopes it’s the latter.</p><p>He can imagine the pod on fire, plummeting towards Earth, and slamming into the ground. In bad movies the protagonist would survive with nothing more than a couple scrapes and an attractive scar. But then, this is real life and not <em>Santa Claus Conquers the Martians</em> or <em>Space Mutiny</em>.</p><p>Joel Robinson was <em>really </em>in space and now he’s <em>really </em>plummeting down from space in a ball of fiery light. Just like he imagined thousands of times before, but this time it's real.</p><p>And okay, there must still be oxygen because he’s hyperventilating.</p><p>Joel imagines the bots sitting alone in the theater, an empty seat between them, the title credits fade and Joel’s escape pod is center screen. </p><p>“There’s no way he survives this.” Crow might say, “The odds are like one thousand million to zero. It's more likely that Mitchell will become cool.”</p><p>“RIP Joel Robinson. He was a good man. I guess. He will be remembered for his bad taste in literature and his ugly red jumpsuits.” Tom might add, “Also, for dying in the most horrific way possible. I can’t even imagine. Ouch.”</p><p>Joel laughs and it hurts so bad. The warning lights get more erratic. He closes his eyes and seconds later the pod slows down. He doesn’t die.</p><p>A parachute erupts into the clouds and he’s gliding. Red lights turn to yellow, then to green, then flash off. It can barely be called a crash landing, it’s gentle. There's a thump and he's landed. Thank God for autopilot.   </p><p>Joel’s alone in the small dark metal container. He thinks he can hear birds. When he clicks the red button and opens the top of his space to earth Uber, the pod fills with hot light. Sunshine. Warmth. <em>Fresh air. </em></p><p>He practically topples out onto the desert floor. Green brush is propped up around him. He can hear the birds above him louder now, louder than in the escape pod, flying above him high in the sky. They're closer to the satellite than he is. <em>Huh.</em> Joel closes his eyes, lying on his back in the middle of nowhere, and presses his hands into the warm mix of dirt of sand. It's real. He's really feeling the ground under his fingers. He's really feeling the sun on his face. </p><p>He can hear Tom's voice in his head, "Watch out for snakes!" Then Crow's, "Yeah, idiot."</p><p>When he opens his eyes there’s a kangaroo towering above him, all big and muscular, staring down at Joel like he’s the weird guy that crashed his car into the kangaroo's backyard. Maybe he did.</p><p>He's survived watching cheesy movies.</p><p>He's survived being trapped in space. </p><p>He's survived crash landing (somewhere) in the Australian Outback. </p><p>Joel wonders if he'll die being kicked to death by a kangaroo.  </p><p>"Classic Joel." Tom might say, "Always down on his luck."</p><p>Joel raises his hand above his face, in what could either be interpreted as a wave or a defensive move, and the kangaroo tilts it’s head at him, “Hey there," Joel says sheepishly, "Sorry about crashing here. I was aiming for Area 51.”  </p><p>The kangaroo stares at him. A moment passes. Tough crowd.</p><p>The kangaroo jumps, turning his head quickly, as the ground erupts with the vibrations of a vehicle. "Hey look, another Kangaroo!" </p><p>"What do you expect kid, this is Australia!" Crow riffs on cue in Joel's imagination. He smiles. He wonders if he's in shock. </p><p>A safari vehicle rolls down the rough terrain towards him. The kangaroo starts to hop away, towards where the sun and sky meet the horizon of flat desert. </p><p>"Is that a guy right there? With the Kangaroo? Is he dead?"</p><p>Then, "Is that a space ship? Near the dead guy?"</p><p>Joel turns his head and watches as the animal hops away. He imagines Tom and Crow on their pogo sticks. It's the last thing he remembers before waking up in the hospital.</p>
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